One summer day in 2011...
"Right now I am supposed to be at a client's house cleaning but as the morning progressed things just weren't going to accomodate this plan. I clean houses during the day but at night I create things with polymer clay - well, let me tell you a late night fling staying up until the wee, wee hours of the morning - two nights ago has wreaked havoc on my daily schedule for today - I guess I am getting too old to pull all nighters. I desparately wrestled with getting out of bed this morning - personally, I shouldn't have even been on the road but I did manage to drive my daughter to school - she had to make her own lunch.
When I returned home, I grappled with what my set of daily tasks were and everything was just too blurry to remember, so I tramped my way back upstairs and just laid down. I thought if I just read something inspirational maybe that would rouse me from my slumberous state. "Just 15 minutes, its all I need", I kept telling myself - I have to get to M's by 10:30. Ten AM arrives and I am still not up and about - just slightly awake, I rouse myself and realize I have to motor - has the dog been fed? I have to call my friend who was scheduled to walk with me later. She needs to know I am running behind and won't be able to join her later. I must eat something, pack a lunch. I have people to email and update - time is of the essence and my body is just not responding. I call my friend, her husband answered - she was out - I can't even put a proper sentence together - he probably thinks I am "on" something. I rush around, grab my cell, my cleaning schmock, purse, sunglasses - checked to see if the dog had food - finally out the door. I jump in the van, then stop, peer through my rearview mirror to catch a glimpse of what's in the back, "yep the cleaning stuff is there," I vaguely remember. Thank God.
I am on the road now, thinking, "I can do this! I'll be at my client's house in 20 minutes - I will do my 5.5 hours of cleaning and I'll be back just in time to get Emma from Rugby, rush home and get her ready to scoot up to Barrie for an acting class. So far so good, I can do this!"
Things are fine when I get to my client's - it's around 11:00 am - no one's home - good, I get more done when no one's there - no need to explain why I am late - I unload my van with my stuff - vaccum cleaner, mop, bucket, basket of cleaning supplies and promptly head up to the door to let myself in - hmm, where's the key? Where is the key, where are my client's keys! Memory starts to fill in - keys, on the chain with the others, where are the...memory flash, the key is on the key chain that's still hanging with the others, where, I rummage through my supplies, check my pockets, look in my purse, no keys, memory is fuzzy, yes, as the dawing realization materializes, "omg, are you serious?" I ask myself - they're 25 minutes away hanging in my foyer! Great! It's now 11:30 am - I have to do something - I ring the door - no answer - well, of course, this could be the case because there aren't any cars in the drive way - hey, one must always be hopeful. OK - what about the garage - I hate to do this but just maybe the garage entrance is open - I manage one of the doors and voila - it opens up - just maybe I am in luck. But is the laundry room entrance unlocked? After rummaging through the obstacles in the garage I go for the door - it's locked. So, now I guess I am going home to get the key - do I want to make another trip out this way and do only a partial clean? I have to weigh the options - tomorrow I have a morning client I can try to fit M. in the afternoon. It will be a late day tomorrow by the looks of it. Of course, I scour my cell phone contact list to see if I have M's work number - nada - n/a - of course, isnt' this how it always happens when you need something most?
In the van - going home - my thought processes goes something like this, "there's a vision of Donald Trump and I am in the board room and he simply says to me, "you're fired!" That's what I am thinking - "fired from life" - All because I stayed up late two nights before - probably didn't eat right last night and today I am paying the consequences.
I get home - my dog who is obviously mad at me for not taking her for a walk had a "joyfest" with all my garbage and recycling material and has so kindly decorated my house with it. I recoil in total disgust - do I want to love up my cute little dog at this moment or do I want to "yell"at her? but as she's lying there with all paws in the air with a look of " I know I have been bad but I am so CUTE! and so defenseless. Really, I am so damn CUTE, how can you be mad at me?". She seems to know what I am thinking and yes, I can't be mad and besides look at what a mess I made of my day - sleeping in, forgetting my key... I roll my eyes, utter something like, "bad dog" - barely - I haven't much energy to even "chew her out".
In the van - going home - my thought processes goes something like this, "there's a vision of Donald Trump and I am in the board room and he simply says to me, "you're fired!" That's what I am thinking - "fired from life" - All because I stayed up late two nights before - probably didn't eat right last night and today I am paying the consequences.
I get home - my dog who is obviously mad at me for not taking her for a walk had a "joyfest" with all my garbage and recycling material and has so kindly decorated my house with it. I recoil in total disgust - do I want to love up my cute little dog at this moment or do I want to "yell"at her? but as she's lying there with all paws in the air with a look of " I know I have been bad but I am so CUTE! and so defenseless. Really, I am so damn CUTE, how can you be mad at me?". She seems to know what I am thinking and yes, I can't be mad and besides look at what a mess I made of my day - sleeping in, forgetting my key... I roll my eyes, utter something like, "bad dog" - barely - I haven't much energy to even "chew her out".
I call my client - she's so empathetic - I love this woman - she has to be one of the kindest souls I know in this world - she explained how the day before for her was like mine today. She's visiting with her brother for a few days and she soon found that she had packed the wrong clothes for the weather and had brought a pair of jeans she thought were hers. At first glance, she thought to herself when she first put them on, "Wow, miracle weight loss!" and soon realized she had taken her husband's jeans.. She too began to see that her day just wasn't going to be "right" from the "getgo". Thank you M. for knowing and understanding my "flurried" state of mind. She kindly told me to have a nice cup of tea and to get some rest.
So here I am relaxing - still feeling guilty - I must get working as I have a workshop to host next Tuesday at a private boys school - I must get the clay and the project that we're going to do prepared for them.
I know that life is about finding a rhythm and that planning ahead is essential to stress free living. (well at least a little less stress) Obviously, great in concept, but rather hard to execute - I am living proof of this! Anticipating how to approach the day's events - organization and discipline are admirable pursuits; like not staying up so late that you can't FUNCTION right for the the next day or two. I know some people are wired differently and they seem to have more "wiggle room" in their schedules (or they're stoked on Red Bull) but I am realizing that I need to be more structured and that I must have good night's sleep if I am going to get anything done well and to plan ahead. I need to learn to be ready the night before - all the things your Mom taught you and you never listened to, well, take a mental note: Go to bed early, eat well and plan ahead - my friend has this saying, "early to bed, early to rise, makes a man prosperous and wise". You know what, I need to make that my mantra until I get it right:)
I know that life is about finding a rhythm and that planning ahead is essential to stress free living. (well at least a little less stress) Obviously, great in concept, but rather hard to execute - I am living proof of this! Anticipating how to approach the day's events - organization and discipline are admirable pursuits; like not staying up so late that you can't FUNCTION right for the the next day or two. I know some people are wired differently and they seem to have more "wiggle room" in their schedules (or they're stoked on Red Bull) but I am realizing that I need to be more structured and that I must have good night's sleep if I am going to get anything done well and to plan ahead. I need to learn to be ready the night before - all the things your Mom taught you and you never listened to, well, take a mental note: Go to bed early, eat well and plan ahead - my friend has this saying, "early to bed, early to rise, makes a man prosperous and wise". You know what, I need to make that my mantra until I get it right:)
Amanda
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